The Ways We Love

My apologies,readers (if there are any of you). It has been quite sometime since my last post but senior year came bombarding in and that was the end of my freedom.


At this point, senior year is becoming a blur. All I do is go through the motions and question my sanity a little each day but mostly, it's like the entire world is on fast forward. Mostly, I drift. In and out of sleep, day dreams, mindless homework completing, and a constant subconscious ponderance of where I belong in this crazy, messed up world.


But you know, that's what makes life so beautiful - the dysfunction of it all. In some strange way, it's like looking through a broken kaleidoscope. We are never sure, even when the kaleidoscope's working, what we are supposed to be experiencing. Then you toss in emotion, power, money, stress, confusion and everything becomes that more detailed - that more intricate. But it is so breathtaking. The complicated explanations, emotions, exultations - life's puzzles - are simply awe inspiring. It is when we embrace the chaos or solve the puzzle that we truly begin to live.


The only thing, in all of this mess, that makes life worth living, is love. Whether it is love of money, family, friends, God, music, people - whatever it is, something drives us. Everyday we live for something. Some of us live for the laughter of our friends, the chirp of a bird, the glimmer of the stars at night, or the smile of someone who has opened their eyes. It is so different for all of us. I have spent days feeling alone and lost and desperate...until I remember that I am only alone if I choose to be. We can't expect everybody to give love if we never give in turn.


To state it simply and leave no doubt - I love God. Period. I love that He was willing to die for me, even before I was born. Even before I lost the perfect innocence that children have, long before that, He knew that I would be born, would love and lose, and ultimately fail Him. But He still died. He knew it was coming and He could have run - but He didn't. He chose to stay so that the rest of us had the choice to know God. It wasn't even a guarantee that we would get to, or even make us want to, but that we might have the choice to know Him. Without my faith, I would not be here today, sitting at my computer, writing this lesson I have learned for no one in particular. I love Him, like He loves me - unconditionally.


We love whole-heartedly, selfishly, selflessly, endlessly, and immeasurably. We give our hearts to some people who either, cherish it, hope it goes away, or don't even realize that a gift has been laid at their feet. Now, this is not to dissuade anyone from loving or falling in love. Love is amazing, it's comfy, it's comforting, it's heart-warming. It is the goofy grin that you wear when life couldn't be any better but it is also the frown that you wear when you think the pain can't get any worse. In the words of Morrie Schwartz, "Love always wins." We show love in tears, laughter, small smiles made at turned backs or closed doors, dancing when nobody is watching, singing while strolling down the sidewalk. We show love in listening, in holding a hand, in catching tears, passing a Kleenex, holding a shoulder, or giving a giant bear hug. Love has so many faces - faces that have been lost in the crowds of city streets of today's buy-up, sell-out philosophy.


I am still not entirely sure that I know where I belong in this world - but I do know what my job is. My job is to live every day more self-lessly than the last. It is to be the love for others that Christ is for me. It is to clap and cry, laugh and love, hurt and heal with those around me. The biggest desire for most people is to leave a legacy in this world - to leave a mark of remembrance so that when we are gone we are not forgotten. I challenge you today to let love be your legacy.

Let love be your guiding light. Let it shine inside you and lead others. Let it save you when you are hurt and humble you when you are proud. Let love be your stronghold and your kryptonite. But most of all - let love be your hope.

Playlist: I Celebrate the Day - Relient K, Love Song - Sky, Everything You Want - Vertical Herizon, The Time Has Come - Hillsong United, The Riddle - Five for Fighting, Forever - Chris Brown, Because You Loved Me - Celine Dion, All I Want To Do - Sugarland, Bent - Matchbox 20, The Right Kind of Wrong -LeAnne Rimes, Somewhere Only We Know - Keane, Pictures of You - The Last Goodnight, Whatever It Takes - Lifehouse, No Reins - Rascal Flatts, I'll Be - Edwin McCain